How to Connect with Your Spouse

In marriage, a clear understanding of who you are as a person can have an impact on the relationship with your spouse. To understand who you are, you must be able to realize that there are two worlds. These worlds are the spirit world and the natural world.

A philosopher by the name of Plato talked about this concept. He talked about the world that is not changing as being the “world of being”. Plato also called the world we live in the “world of becoming”. The physical world we live in is constantly changing and it is called the world of becoming (Solomon, 2006). You and your spouse are human beings. One part is “human” and the other is the “being” part. These two relate to the two worlds we call the spirit and the natural world.

A wife must appeal to her husbands “being” to really have a good connection with him. She must utilize her inner feelings to connect with her husband. This is the way a wife can help her husband to have the feeling of being safe in her presence. A husband must be able to share his thoughts without the fear of being rejected. This level of comfort in a marriage relationship helps a man to really be drawn to his wife with unmistakable devotion.

A marriage relationship cannot do well if it depends on human concepts only. Remember that a thought created image of self, is not the true self. A misunderstanding of who you are as a being can contribute to a lot of misunderstandings in your marriage. A thought is a concept and you as a human being are much more than just a concept. When a husband and his wife connect at the level of “being” they can be drawn to each other in ways that cannot fully be explained by human reasoning.

Therefore as a wife you must pay attention to your inner feelings and instead of talking about all sorts of achievements talk about what someone did to make you happy. Feelings are a powerful resource for women. A husband on the other hand can appeal to his wife by his performance, although he would still need to be complimented when he does a real good job. If you have had a real good time together, compliment each other, although a man might need it more if it has to do with some kind of performance.

When your wife cooks well, compliment her good job. This can help you as a couple to continue thinking about each other whenever you are away from each other.


Solomon, R. C. (2006). The Nature of Reality. In The Big Question A Short Introduction To Philosophy (p. 121). Belmont, California, United States of America: Thomson Wadworth.